But because I believe in humanity, i am doing this, we are not uncivilised mon keigh's that deserve extermination. We are rational, good beings. We may stumble, we may do terrible things but that is not all that we are. We have birthed Sinners and Saviours, Heroes and Villains but we didn't end the world during the Cold War and we're trying to save it now from global warming.
So Miss Chatoyance this review is basically aimed at your anti-human rhetoric, to explain why it is wrong and to attempt to reason with you as one fellow human to another. As while a few of my friends might thing I'm being stupid trying to extend an olive branch to you, but I'll be damned if I didn't try. As giving up without even trying isn't me.
So the Review of The Conversion Bureau (TCB), Recombinant 63 By Chatoyance, Chapter One: The Siren Call Of Secrets.
1) So you haven't heard about Scotland Wanting Independence from the UK I take it(1)? The fact of the matter is a "Northeuropean Zone" existing let alone being part of this "Worldgovernment" is pure nonsense. How many people have died for democracy, how idealised is the concept of freedom in Western Society?
And yet you say six hundred or so families would rule the world without a massive revolution? That even the idea of mega corporations ruling the world would be stopped by the governments of the world. It just wouldn't happen, its so unrealistic that I consider TCB!Equestria ISOTing is more likely to happen than that happening.
2) You attack writers of being racist, while you use the word Gypsy without actually realising the fact that it is seen as offensive term by some of the Romani people. If you are going to describe a nation as nomadic then describe them differently.
3) The Fukushima Daiichi nuclear disaster you so callously hint at was caused by the tidal wave going over the tidal barrier, and the media hyped it up as there was actually very little radiation released by what happened into the surroundings. The matter of the fact is that the Japan is not going to let that happen again and even if it did the nuclear fallout would not affect the entire island chain and it wouldn't make the islands so radioactive that they needed to be abandoned.
As nuclear materials have a half life. Say something has the half life of an hour, in one hour their will be half of the amount of radioactive material left and in another hour it will be less. It just doesn't stay there constantly like the Game Fallout so Japan would still exist as a nation.
4) If there was no more oil, then we'd use coal, if there was no more coal then we'd use nuclear. Without considering the fact that with Wind turbines, Solar power, hydroelelectric power could work properly without being hand waved as not enough. And that's not considering Fusion(2) which is getting ever closer to break-even point. Which means that we wouldn't be living without power.
5) Genetically engineered crops are tested to the point of absurdity, we wouldn't destroy wheat because of greed. Heck the fact of the matter is that if you put the crops we have selectively bred to this point through the tests that we put GM foods through then most would fail to meat safety concerns.
6) There is no way to make Wheat not bio-degrade None what so ever, that is on a par with the Mass Effect 3 ending. Basic nonsense that I will not even argue against as all biological things bio-degrade, heck even the most persistent plastics degrade after a thousand years.
7) Gwenhwyfar is the welsh version of Gwen(3) not scottish, this is not just me nitpicking but what parent names their child Gwenhwyfar? The Internet has several naming sites(4) which are useful to get names that fit the character.
8) Books are not going to go out of fashion, did plays stop when the TV was invented? No. Books will persist. Holograms will not replace them for the reason that people prefer Books to Films, the medium is different and you can do different things with it as I prefer a good read compared. Also books have their pros and cons over digital medium but you can't categorically state that they are better, that hints at Luddite thinking which is kind of funny seeing as you are posting this on the internet
9)Hypernet? Why would they just randomly change the name of the internet? The prefix Hyper(5) comes from the word over in Ancient Greek and means in English: over, above, beyond, excessive, existing in more than three spatial dimensions or linked non-sequentially. The word Hypernet is nonsensical and has no meaning. Trying to attempt to sound futuristic by just affixing the prefix hyper to net and having it replace the internet is pointless.
10) Censorship. You try and make out that ponies are better as do all the Pro-TCB camp does yet you have them censor media for their own personal reasons. The right of free speech means that you have the right to say or write whatever you want yet the ponies who you claim are better are being totalitarian and deciding that instead of saving everything they will only save what they want. If they want to save knowledge then they should save it all and let every sophont that survives the barrier should make their own decision instead of taking that away.
11) Luna And Celestia are not gods and being a god does not make one perfect. Look at Greek Mythology, a god who has the right to declare that they can do what they want is not a good thing. Also you referenced Authors being racist yet your character is judging Luna based on appearance
12) The fact of the matter is that humanity would not just roll over and allow the Barrier to destroy humanity and all our works, we have struggled for millennia against everything the world has thrown at us but you think that this so called three day war would have us just roll over?
Even if we couldn't win we wouldn't just surrender, Ever heard about Project Orion(6)? If the Barrier is expanding and can't stop then we'd flee, we wouldn't roll over and die.
13) How can the world even work with Celestia and Luna when they aren't stopping the barrier expanding? If they are "Gods" can't they just stop it with a thought? They are deliberately wiping out humanity yet the only opposition is the Human Liberation Front (HLF). Say some alien race invaded Earth and decided to wipe out humanity would everyone just surrender without opposition?
What TCB!Equestria is doing is no different from the Borg from Star Trek. Yet there is only token opposition, which is frankly ludicrous.
14) It's Magic not Magik. Why would they use that term when they aren't wiccans or other people who believe in magic
15) The Human Race hasn't existed for 50,000 years, Homo Sapiens has been around for at least 200,000 years and our genus Homo has existed for at least 1,900,000 years(7) please do your research.
16) The Great Collapse? Going back to point 1) the world wouldn't allow corporations to take over the world, especially if they are the reason for this Great Collapse
Now obviously you know grammar, you know spelling and you know how to write a story. But the fact remains is that The TCB is a horrible story, it is misanthropic, it declares humanity to be wrong. So please stop. Please